Saint Mary of the Immaculate Conception Roman Catholic Church

Dear Good People of Saint Mary,

Last weekend was surreal for a place that is normally so filled with people. We had between one person (7pm Sat.) and about 250 (5pm Sun.) and anywhere in between at the other Masses. We went ahead and kept all Masses for the weekend so that brave souls who might venture out would not be frustrated finding that Mass was canceled. We shoveled pretty much all weekend, trying to keep ahead of the storm (and then clean up) to be ready for those who did attend.

I seldom speak about money at Saint Mary, because we generally are moving along fine with our weekly offertory, making our payroll, paying bills and covering our $42K/month mortgage payment on all the renovations which we completed five years ago. The parish voted, when our renovations began seven years ago, to avoid a capital campaign and pay off our debt through the monthly collection and a building fund envelope every month.

This week I have one favor to ask: when it snows like this and we lose, virtually, an entire collection, it is a hard hit for the parish, about $32,000. We rely on every collection, our budgets don’t allow for savings. So if you would, please remember the collection that we lost and help us catch up. (And pray we don’t have another snow Sunday!)

While talking with a Methodist pastor friend of mine, I asked if they were dependent on weekly offertory like we were. He said no, in fact, 80% of their budget was covered with electronic automatic transfers/payments and their endowment. Ours is more likely 20% electronic now (thanks, those of you who have enrolled) and we have no endowment.

Well, last week I was a little down due to the fact that I had signed 2,700+ letters to those who had contributed nothing on paper to the parish. In that letter I reflected on the many reasons why this might be happening. I hope we will distribute two bulletins this weekend so that you can see both of them, as some information has changed.

But this past week I had the time to really look  over and sign all the 2,500+ letter of people who did give to the parish, some a lot, some a little—all very much appreciated. Some people are very generous. Of those who use envelopes, the average is about $17 a week, which represents a profound commitment to the parish. I’m so glad I signed these letters last, because I was left with a powerful thankfulness for all of you who keep the mission of Saint Mary alive. Thank you.

I want to say all of this because, as you know, the Bishops’ Lenten Appeal comes next weekend. The work of the diocese is very important, we must—all of us—support this work that is regional unless we become selfish, even as a parish. Bishop Loverde asks that each and every family make some form of a pledge—even if it is a small amount each month for a few months—to live out our regional responsibility as a local church of Arlington. (So much of it benefits us here in Fredericksburg, anyway.)

That said, I think sometimes we focus so much on other charities that we forget our own parish. An example of this was the outpouring of your loving support for so many charities and collections prior to Christmas—then our Christmas collection itself, about $52K, was $10K below what we had budgeted, based on the previous year’s Christmas offertory. And Masses were fuller than ever…

Last year we went $45K over our goal for the Bishop’s Lenten Appeal, and so our goal has been raised this year by $25K, to $395,000. This seems like a big amount – but if those 2,500 families who give would pledge $10 a month for 6 months, we would be mostly there. Of course, for those who do more, your continued support is very much appreciated.

Let’s try this again this year. Commitment Sunday is next weekend, when we fill out our pledge cards for the Diocese of Arlington. Let’s not put this off, and get it done in a couple of weeks, and make our goal. We will continue to publish our progress in making our goal for the Bishop’s Lenten Appeal. Once it is met, we’re done. If you forget to respond in time before we meet our goal and still want to give, I ask you to consider Saint Mary. That way, the diocese receives what is our obligation to give, and we can start to build a financial cushion in the parish that will help snowy weekends be less worrisome. Thanks.

God bless you,

Dear Good People of Saint Mary,

It is a pretty rough week (last week), the week when I sign the 2,731 zero-contribution letters that we send out—to 54% of our families—for whom we have no record of giving anything to the parish in the past year. Some people I have known for quite a few years, which always surprises me. And many, many Spanish-speaking families, a number that is the fastest growing part of our parish. I wonder if we are doing something wrong. Of course, there are many who are just trying to make ends meet; these times seem to become more and more difficult, it is true.

When my brothers and I were kids we watched our parents write the check every week. We were far from rich, and lived without a lot of the things we saw that our  friends had, but we knew that the Church got the first $20 (this was in the 70s), at times when we knew that there wasn’t a lot to spare. Maybe this is one of the reasons  that my brother and I became priests. We witnessed our parents’ commitment to the parish.

I wonder if successive generations would remain more faithful to the practice of our faith if parents made visible the sacrifices they made in support of the Church. It would be a living example for children to know how to pick up where previous generations left off. Where your treasure is, there will your heart will also be. Children watch.

Maybe it was because my grandparents were first and second generation Americans of immigrant families. They had a keen sense that the only success of the Church would be due to their support. In this new country, they realized, there would be no benevolent ruler to build new versions of all the beautiful, old churches they knew  in the “old country” and maintain them. Today  i Europe things have gotten so bad that governments have had to step back in and shoulder the expense of maintaining all these historic churches because of their historic significance. Sadly, few of our churches in this country will ever qualify for the rosters of historic preservation societies.

Or, if you visit Central and South America, you’ll find the same remarkable churches from previous centuries. But with the wave of dictators and 150 years of freemasonry which has sought to destroy the Church in these countries, confiscating properties and murdering, straining faith communities financially to the breaking point, the Church is largely now controlled by the government as a “service” to the people. Salaries, buildings, maintenance and community development are all subsidized. At least, this was my experience studying several summers in Mexico and working two years in the Dominican Republic. There is not the direct correspondence between the Sunday Offertory and the survival of the parish in those countries as there is here.

What can we do to restore the Church as the heart of the community and the center of peoples’ family life?—This is the question that so many people are asking. I would like to know if this is even an ungrounded, idealized, sentimental vision of a past based on pictures of big, fancy churches and pious stories of pay, pray and obey. Maybe we need to quit looking at the past and see what we have now, where are we now?

What do we have now? What if we remove the word “restore” in our question and replace it with the word “build”? What can we do to build the Church as the heart of the community and the center of peoples’ family life?

Attendance at Mass here seems to be up and down. On an average Sunday (no football) we might have between 5,000 and 6,000 for Masses. Maybe a third of the parish population? How do we get the word out to all the people who aren’t here? Whatever the reason doesn’t really matter, what matters is they be here.

I’m told the biggest reason that people have left the Church is over marriage issues. Not divorce, but remarriage outside of the Church after divorce without the process of annulment. I’m told that previous pastors at Saint Mary may have refused people requesting to petition annulments. This was wrong. I’m sorry. Pope Francis is w0rking on this one, we will soon see the details  of a new, faster process for annulments. But the problem goes even deeper, I think. Now there is a whole new generation of Catholics—even practicing Catholics—who don’t seem to know that their being married outside the Church actually excludes them from receiving sacraments. Either they weren’t listening, or they were never told.

Maybe if we all knew more, we would find solutions. This is where your office as lay people becomes so important. Show your children how to be faithful, and talk about these things where there is silence, contribute in the conversation.

God bless you.