Saint Mary of the Immaculate Conception Roman Catholic Church

Dear Good People of St. Mary,

In the next few weeks we will be very busy putting together the Catalog of Parish Ministries for the upcoming annual Parish Life Weekend, September 20/21. For those of you who are new, each September St. Mary has several major events which, in a way, mark the “beginning of the ministry year”: once everyone is back from vacations and summer activities, we start school at Holy Cross Academy, we open Religious Education for the year, and we have a big celebration Ice Cream Social, Cakewalk and Dance out at Holy Cross (September 14, this year it actually falls on the Feast of the Triumph of the Cross).

The following weekend, September 20/21,every ministry in the parish (nearly 100) presents their work under tents outside the church before and after all Masses, to let people get to know what the possibilities might be for their own participation in ministry, and know they are welcome to get involved. Ministries include all the major areas of work represented in committee by the Parish Advisory Board: education, outreach, liturgy, operations, and parish life (the social committee). We call this “Parish Life Weekend.”

Included in the catalog packet that all 5,200+ households receive after Labor Day is a Commitment Card. Between Parish Life Weekend and the following weekend, “Commitment Sunday,” all parishioners are asked to enter into a period of discernment, to ask the question: “How is God calling me to serve this year?” Sometimes, I think, this period of discernment is not taken so seriously, and people don’t realize how seriously we need to take this matter of active participation/involvement in the life of the parish. Every parishioner should be involved in the work of the Church in some way, to give back in love what we have received in love. Everyone is asked to return the card as an outward sign of their internal disposition to pray, serve, support. Even those who are already serving in a ministry or ministries are asked to renew their commitment by completing a commitment card.

Anyway, on the weekend of September 27/28, Commitment Sunday, we offer these Commitment Cards as the second offering, an offering of how we commit to pray in the coming year, how we commit to serve, and how we commit to support the active mission of the parish which is the salvation of souls and service of others to the glory of God. In a recent interview with a marketing firm who is seeking ways to best promote the services of Catholic Charities, I was asked what I thought was the role of the Pastor in getting people involved. I knew the answer they were looking for: the Pastor’s job is to be the cheerleader, to encourage, to plead, to offer bribes where necessary and guilt as a last resort to those who will eventually wear down and give in to the request to take on a particular ministry as their extracurricular activity. How many times have people taken on a “job” in the Church because “Father asked.” And how many times have people, after a long period of time (or even a short one) begun to resent the time and energy that it takes? Ultimately, “I’m doing it for Father” doesn’t cut it anymore. We see this so often. People burn out, and when their term is up they feel bad about the resentment they feel and drift away. Sometimes they disappear. It’s like we use up and call it mission.

This year our period of discernment will have a different approach. I am going to ask all of you to look into your hearts. In what way has God prepared this place for you so that your gifts—the gift that is you—might be realized? Not just used; realized. Because, you see, it isn’t “Father” who calls the Church into being, it is God. Jesus isn’t the sign of God’s love, he is God’s love. And he started the Church—us—to be the living signs of his presence in the world.

It’s a big job, but somebody has to do it. And we can only accomplish it in communion with him, together. For this reason, our theme this year is “Given in love, Called in love.”

Dear Good People of St. Mary,

As I’m writing this bulletin article, the final game of the World Cup begins in five hours and I have to write this, so I still don’t know how this is going to turn out. I received this photo from a number of people this week and thought it had a lot to say about the power of prayer. I wonder who’s going to win!

I keep a list of all the things that come up most frequently during the year waiting for a quiet week to write about them. At the top of my list is an explanation about marriage: we are continually surprised how little understanding there seems to be about marriage and remarriage, the difference between divorce and annulment. In the spring we will welcome back a speaker to work on the issue of annulments.

In the meantime, call us with questions, please. Today I want to talk briefly about the necessity of sacramental marriage for Catholics. It seems not to be well known that Catholics must be married sacramentally in the Church in order to be validly married. Of course, civil marriage is civil marriage and supplies all the legality necessary for the legitimacy of children and all laws according to the state. But a Catholic who is not married in the Catholic Church, according to “canonical form” (man and woman exchanging vows according to the Rite of Marriage, vows being received by a “duly authorized sacred minister – priest or deacon – and witnessed by two witnesses) is no longer in sacramental communion with the Church. This sacramental communion includes Eucharist and Anointing, as well as the possibility of serving as a Godparent or Sponsor.

It doesn’t mean that you can no longer be a member of the Church, as some have said they were told. But it does prevent you from the active sacramental life of the Church. Dispensations from Canonical Form are sometimes granted by the bishop for certain pastoral needs, but not commonly. Here are a couple of explanations addressing other common misconceptions:

• A non-Catholic (baptized or unbaptized) intended spouse doesn’t have to become Catholic for marriage in the Catholic Church. There is the usual marriage preparation required for any couples seeking marriage in the Church.

• The common expression “getting a marriage blessed” for those previously married outside the Church follows the same process as for those never married, called a “Convalidation.” There is preparation, and usually a small ceremony with two witnesses and close family and friends. It is not customary to celebrate large weddings with music and all the flowers, dress and wedding party for those who are already living together without the benefit of the sacrament.

• Those seeking to marry a subsequent time, need to fulfill the process of petitioning and receiving an annulment, a process proving that what was necessary for the first sacrament wasn’t present, and declaring that this person is free to celebrate the sacrament for the first time, in order to be married in the Church.

This is a lot of the work that we are doing on a daily basis – please take advantage of reentering sacramental life if you need to. If you know someone who needs a little encouragement, please share this article with them.

May God bless you,